Safe?

 Monday, November 15^th 2010

     I’d never seen flames so high or felt this cold to the bone before. The Darkness was attacking from all directions, but Penderson shielded me from both the fire and ice. I closed my eyes and tried to block out the shrills of Thornbeasts, ignore the noise of death until Penderson told me it was okay. I was SAFE now.

     Okay, so I guess I’m ready to admit that Connie’s impending threesome has messed with my psyche. I even asked her flat out today, “Why don’t guys hit on me? I mean I know I’m not hot or anything but I’m not deformed.” Evidently, I always look “standoffish.” What the hell does that mean? It’s not like I walk around looking angry all day, just a little disinterested. Then she asked if I even really liked anything. I mumbled something about TV and changed the subject. I made the mistake of asking my mom what she thought and she said that “perhaps your negative attitude is sending out the wrong signals.”

     She’s stupid.

     Also, it doesn’t help that I started reading The Game by Neil Strauss and will be finding it difficult to talk to boys ever, ever again. Plus I'm still pissed that i didn't get to see Avalon High this weekend.