Good night, sarah jane smith

Wednesday, April 20^th 2011

R.I.P Elisabeth Sladen, you will be missed.

     So despite my issues with how it’s happened so far, I can’t argue with the eliminations so far on DWTS. Petra was sweet and doing all right, but she just didn’t have the personality you need for a long haul on the show. Also, Mark Ballas, you ARE the problem, so please fix it. Also, Carrie Ann Inaba can NOT change her name when she gets married or else she’s entirely useless to me.

     I’m slowly getting back into the swing of the lunchtime chain gang again. It’s weird to think that I’m now actually a member of a sort of respectable social group. We’re still a bunch of loser freshman but Vanessa is pretty enough to be popular and Connie is friendly enough and I guess that I’m sorta skating by on their coattails. People have def been nicer to me this semester than last and of course I’m now questioning the reasons I’m not a social pariah (piranha? Paella? I forget how the saying goes) anymore.

     I bring this up because a boy asked me out today. I’m pretty sure he was just shooting for Vanessa and missed by one but still. He actually asked me in the caf with like witnesses and everything. I show him down of course. He wasn’t hideous or anything but he def wasn’t my type.

     My type. Please shoot me for saying that. Also, if you ever hear my talk about caring about my lawn or express desire to wash my car, shoot me. I’ve obviously been taken over by an alien race.

     I had a crazy eerie dream last night that Bethany from Best Coast died and I found out from browsing iTunes which had an in memoriam sale. I was frustrated because “I have all this stuff and I’m sad so I want to buy something.”

     Send me emails if you’re bored. I think I’m interested again.

Sacrifice to stop the Invaders from the Red Sun vs Defenders from the Blue Sun. Part 7

Monday, April 18^th 2011

     Sacrifice to stop the Invaders from the Red Sun vs Defenders from the Blue Sun. Part 7

     I am a, no I was a, yes I could still be a misfit until the attack began. I was ready to write myself off until I got the call.

     Now I lead.

     I will not disappoint. The red sun goes down tonight.

sweet pajamas and scary chili.

Saturday, April 15^th 2011

     Scream 4 is the greatest movie of all freaking time. Well, the greatest horror movie… okay, it’s by far the best Scream movie ever and you can’t take that away from me.

     Why did no one tell me The Facts of Life was so awesome?

     Also, Birds of Prey #11 is probably my favorite of the entire new series (oh yeah I guess I’m reviewing comics now too.) from the Batjammies Oracle was wearing to the Black Canary chili through the Huntress/Catman date, this thing was a perfect 10 on the hammer pants scale all the way!

     I’m still feeling out of sorts. I’m nervous about my grades and starting to get bummed about my love life again. I feel some pretty awful poetry or prose coming on… you’ve been warned.

     In the meantime, stay tuned for the brilliant conclusion of you know what.

holy rollers and metagross

Thursday, April 14^th 2011

     For the first in like forever, it is email day!

     Yay.

     I was actually so happy to hear from my old chum Roland that I’m going to put in his entire email. Feel special, Holy Roller. (Please not the play on words with his name “Roland”)

Hello Penelope! 

It really has been too long since I last emailed you. I have been busy on mission trips with my youth group to places in need of Jesus and prayer, such as Mexico, and the city of Hell, Michigan. (Quick note from P.B. This may be Roland’s attempt at humor… but I actually have no idea.)

We have so much catching up to do, where to begin?! I do hope you are remembering to do a good deed daily. (P.B. don’t make fun of me, but I actually have been doing this. Usually it involves not making fun of something Connie said or being civil to my family.) It isn't just for boy scouts you know. Jesus smiles when ever we do nice things for people. Perhaps you could hold the door for your mother, or tell one of your teachers how much you appreciate the sacrifices they make. 

I wish you would stop watching those horrible "Real Housewives of" shows. Those women set a horrible example for young girls. (P.B. ugh!!! I have no defense for this.)

I really do have so much to say but I must jet off. The youth group and I are baking cookies for the church yard sale this Sunday. 

Praise be to the father!

-Roland

ps- more to come! do good deeds daily! there is no secret, only Jesus!

     Ya gotta admit it. The little guy grows on you. Next email comes from MagikarpetCleaner@fakemail.com Penelope, who’s the best Pokemon and why?

     Mr or Mrs Magik, that’s an easy one. Metagross, because he’s a big blue bastard who can do your taxes.

     Nutty Bar time.

America has let me down for the last time. I am voting for change.

Tuesday, April 12^th 2011

     Okay, you know this is coming.

     What the hell was Chelsea Kane doing in the bottom 2? Am I going to have to actually start voting and not just pretend saying I’m voting for someone out loud counts as a vote. America, you’re all sorta reasonable people, right? (don’t answer that!) Why are you not voting for her?

     Okay, I have to do homework now, but I had to get that out.

Degrassi Immortality

Monday, April 12^th 2011

     Why the frak does no one like sucker punch? I admit, it’s a bit umm… okay, there isn’t a lot in the making sense department. But it’s not like Inception was any better. (I think. I didn’t actually see it. My love of Ellen Page if matched by my hatred of Dicaprio. Although now that I’ve made fun of it I feel like I should watch. Grrr.)

     I went to see it with my parents and they were as confused as I was but overall I thought it was a fun non-exploitive action chick flick with one of my least favorite endings of all time. If I didn’t know I’d look ridiculous, I’d be Baby Doll for Halloween this year. (why do I always think I’m actually going to dress up?)

     I also spent an hour playing guitar today. My fingertips are all cut up now. I know, cool right?

     Finally today, I would like to once again say it.

     THANK YOU DEGRASSI! I’m finally all caught up to date and would like to formally welcome Fiona Coyne to Penelope Blackhearts Official Degrassi Hall of Fame. She’s just a brilliant fantastic insane character. She’s been abused by her boyfriend, gone to rehab for alcohol, kissed her brother, kissed a transgendered girl, and kissed her brother’s ex girlfriend, all in this past school year. And through it all she’s managed to fall apart and rise over and over again. She’s just the best.

     Other members of the Penelope Blackhearts Official Degrassi Hall of Fame:

Ellie Nash: Oh Eleanor Nash, how I love you! Poor Ellie never found love. The Degrassi universe kept crapping on her and she took it and survived. She’s the only one I could ever really relate to. I really need to not analyze that statement.

Paige Michalchuk: Paige started off as the biggest bitch on the planet before redefining “learning things the hard way.” At the end of the journey she became one of the most honest and endearing characters, no matter what idiotic storyline she was thrown into.

     I suppose I could put a lot more people in the Hall, but I want to keep it special. Being awesome isn’t enough in this company. You have to convince me that you’re my friend. Again, I am not going to analyze that statement either.

all i ask is don't tell anybody the secrets i told you

Saturday, April 9^th 2011

     Today I slept in and then made another mix for my sewing circle. Since I’ve won them over with previous mixes, I feel like I can be a little more daring here. I call the mix:

We can’t stand for too much of this country:

Learning to Ride / Caitlin Rose

Things Change / Caitlin Rose

Blue Skies Again / Jessica Lea Mayfield

Trouble / Jessica Lea Mayfield

Grown Man / Jessica Lea Mayfield

Asleep / Emily Browning

You Call This Your Home / Hannah Peel

Today Is Not So Far Away / Hannah Peel

Breakfast / EMA

Metal Firecracker / Lucinda Williams

Back Of The Van / Ladyhawke

Juno / Life Without Buildings

Get Away / Yuck

Ladies Choice / Mandy Moore

Watermelons / The Lovely Eggs

Mild Confusion / Tamaryn

Strange Lights / Deerhunter

Some Cities / Doves

Anything, Anything / Dramarama

I Searched / Brilliant Colors

     As always, I will be happy to send this mix to any browser bored enough to email me.

Long hair and dead animals.

Friday, April 8^th 2011

     Connie and Vanessa came by today to watch tangled and it was extremely weird because Connie brought her cousin, Freddy from Freehold, and Vanessa brought one of those platters with tomatoes, celery, carrots and dip. Because she’s a vegetarian now. I don’t wanna think about that because I know it means I’m going to start getting lectured every day at lunch from now on.

     At least her new found love of animals made ordering dinner real easy. I had to get extra cheese on our pizza to compensate for the lack of seasoned carcass.

     Tangled was even better the second time around. I love Mandy Moore. (Now please forget I said that. But seriously, love.)After the movie was went outside and sat on my porch talking and playing catch with my pumpkin plushies. I’ve been really out of it for the last few weeks and it was nice to be social and normal for a night. Also, I think Freddy from Freehold “like likes” me. Since he’s a boy who thinks I’m neat, he obviously is repulsive looking and dull as a rock. But still, it’s nice to be liked.

also, Jessica Lea Mayfield is still album of the year.

daughter of paleface oh yeah new fave record

Wednesday March 6^th 2011

     First off, I have a new official favorite album of the year. “Tell Me” by Jessica Lea Mayfield is super freaking awesome. I don’t know what the hell is in the water in Ohio, but it seems like every other awesome thing comes from there. It’s an alt/roots/country/moody/indie rock record and I’m in love with every lyric and every note. This reminds me, it’s time to bless Connie, Vanessa, Cindy and maybe even Roland with a new music mix.

     Speaking of Roland… where have you gone little drummer boy?

     Since I’m here, I may as well so some email.

     My old pal Cyndi Flansburgh says… wow, okay, I hate Rebecca Black as much as the next gal, but I’m sorry Cyn, I can’t post that kind of language on my blog! I will just skip ahead to the second part of your email,

Selena Gomez or Demi Lovato?

Nick Jonas or Jesse Eisenberg?

Yard Sales or Garage Sales?

Hamburger Helper or Tuna Helper?

Xoxo Cyndi f.

     Cyndi, these are all easy. Even after rehab, I still am loyal to Demi, but I love Selena too. She actually didn’t make me wanna eat glass while she was singing on DWTS last night. Nick Jonas has no penis and Jesse is still great because I refuse to watch The Social Network. Yard sales tend to have more toys/DVDs and garage sales tend to have more books/CDs so that’s a wash.

     Finally, hot tuna is just disgusting. The only kind of tuna I eat is cold and comes from a can that doesn’t spare the life of a dolphin.

     I was going to make this an extra long post and review some movies… but I’ve watched 3 straight Bob Hope movies and even I’m too embarrassed to talk about it.

circumtances beyond our control oh yeah we voted

Tuesday, April 5^th 2011

     Goodbye Wendy Williams!

     I know, I need more interests besides DWTS, but right now it’s all that seems to be going right in my life. After Chelsea Kane danced last night Connie called me up and made me swear my allegiance to Chelsea. I had to agree, she was awesome.

     The only other thing going on that doesn’t suck at all really is that my mom surprised me with 3 tickets to see Marina and the Diamonds in June! It’s gonna be a great time, but mom is going with me, so I have 3 months to decide whether I take Con or Vanessa with me. Maybe by then one of them will stop talking to me by then and that will be that.

     So yeah, I’m still not in the best of moods.

Sacrifice to stop the Invaders from the Red Sun vs Defenders from the Blue Sun. Part 6

Sunday, April 3^rd 2011

     Part 6 of the epic “Sacrifice to stop the Invaders from the Red Sun vs Defenders from the Blue Sun.”

     People denied the Red Sun’s existence until it was too late. Our world was almost decimated by the time the Blue Sun received our distress single and sent us all their Heros.

     The battle was epic. Animal vs Machine, Princesses vs Demons and ONE TO SAVE THEM ALL. But this is not a story that can merely be told. It needs to be felt. My name is Plathonia Deraison and this is my story.

Kidney's fail, it just happens.

Saturday, April 2^nd 2011

     I’m still out of sorts because of school and everything. Evidently my parents do care about my grades (I know, shocking right?) and want me to start applying myself. My mom offered to tutor me in French and my dad in Algebra and I promised I would do anything to avoid being tutored by them. So I’ve been spending a lot of time this week “studying.” For French I downloaded an old program called “French In Action” which has been lauded through the years for not boring the crap out of people. Also, I would like to note this for future French scholars of the world, sleeping with headphones on playing Serge Gainsbourg, Francois Hardy, Stereolab, Fabienne Delsol, Melanie Pain and etc will not improve your French at all, just make you oversleep.

     Speaking of music, in addition to Caitlin Rose I am now also obsessing over Hannah Peel and the new Pains of Being Pure at Heart album. But the real reason I made time to post is that this morning I finally caught up on Degrassi.

     OMFG Holly J peed herself!!! Thank you Degrassi, as always, for the teen torture drama and for the information that if you ignore strep throat you can mess up yer kidneys and pee yourself. Who needs WebMd when you got Degrassi?

     While I’m being lax on the “Blog” (Dear God I still hate that word) and trying to make some sense of life I will be finishing posting “Sacrifice to stop the Invaders from the Red Sun vs Defenders from the Blue Sun.” I know you’re all on the edge of your seats.

Yes, i know. X = Oui

Wednesday, March 30^th 2011

     I just now realized how similar DWTS is to the Hunger Games. I kinda fell asleep before it started on Monday and had to wait till last night and I am all caught up. I’m sad to see the good looking guy booted off, but more importantly, where the f$@#%$# were the Karate Kid’s 8’s and 9’s? He was clearly not being judged on the same level as the rest of them. I was rooting for Kirstie Alley at first but now I’m totally on Team Macchio, Connie wants Chelsea Kane and Vanessa is all for Petra. Even Connie’s boy couldn’t take all the DWTS talk at lunch today and ate as quickly as he could and bailed.

     Okay, I have to go to the bathroom again and I’m done thinking for the night. The only decision I wanna make tonight is whether I watch my new Tangled DVD or wait for the weekend when I’m healthy and able to host company.

     Oh yeah, I’m also failing Algebra and French. Zzzz.

Return from District 12 to District 13.

Monday, March 28^th 2011

     Sorry. Sorry? Sorry!

     I’ve been away (I have to tell you all about West Virginia.) I’ve been sick (I think I may actually take my damn Flintstone’s vitamins.) I’ve been watching Dancing With The Stars. (I got suckered in watching a rerun of the first episode in the hotel room and please don’t get me started on freaking DWTS politics.) I’ve been listening to new music. (Maybe West Virginia really did effect me because I downloaded another country record. Caitlyn Rose’s Own Side Now is my new fave record of the moment.) I have not been compelled to write. Sorry.

     To start off, West Virginia is not the backasswards redneck nightmare people think it is. I was there for 4 days and actually like it a lot better than most places I’ve been. Yes, I realize that I’ve only gone to such glamorous place as Connecticut, Pennsylvania, Delaware and Maryland but you get my point.

     Here are some of the things I learned in West Va. Evidently, I like architecture. I didn’t know that. No trespassing signs are very trendy in certain parts of the world. They also helped remind me that I was actually IN District 12. I only saw 1 girl who looked like Katniss, and she worked at a gas station. Gas stations are kinda awesome in other states. I am now sick as a dog, (okay, someone get me the etymology on that phrase) so I’ll cut it short for now and just say it was a cool time. Zzzzz.